Dating AOL Style Part 2

I did have enough time to sit and ponder the next move; should I be waiting for her, or should I let her wait for me? Each had their attractions and reservations. If I was waiting for her, the attraction would be my dependability - and I could of course orchestrate the best possible posture for her to see me in. First impressions are so important! However, if I was waiting for her, she might spot me and slip quietly out into the eroding evening, leaving me all alone in the winter of my discontent (and Mrs. Williams, my English teacher, thought I was not paying attention).





On the other hand (Have you ever wondered about that expression? Life is generally NOT ambidextrous; there hardly ever is another hand!), if she were waiting for me, she might first meet that airline captain, or think I’m a flake. She might also become so exhilarated by the anticipation she would fall into my arms in a swoon. I settled on being first (Was there ever really any doubt?).

So there I sat, looking as sexy and alluring as a short, pudgy, thinning-hair person could possibly look (did I mention I was getting older also?). Within a matter of seconds, it seemed that everyone knew what was up; I could hear whispering and murmuring.

“See that short pudgy guy over there?”

“...ahhhh, yes?”

“He’s meeting a known axe murderer.”

“No kidding! That’s horrible!”

“Well, that’s not the worst part! For one thing, he got here four hours early,”



“and his pants are wrinkled.”



“And I don’t know if I can tell you this, but...”

“...Yes, go on.... Come on, you can tell me!”

“...Well, OK, but don’t ever tell me I didn’t warn you....”

“Yes?”

“They met in a computer chat room!”








I’m not kidding you; the man fainted dead away. Pausing in reverie, I looked up just in time to see the woman I thought I was supposed to meet walk right past me and, before I could mutter anything, she strolled right up to a very elderly gentleman who was adjusting his teeth and said, “Are you Ken???”

This caused my little heart to soar; I mean, there was no comparison - unless of course the guy was a millionaire. I sauntered up and said, in my best trembling squeaky voice, “Are you _____?” She was.

We sat down and ordered our food, trying to make a good impression. I put a lot of thought into my selection, nothing that would be smelly, nothing that would leave stains on my hands, and nothing that would leave stringy bits of food stuck between my teeth. I think I ordered soup with a straw. We talked and shared brief life stories, we gazed into each other’s eyes. I guess we must have seen no one was home we wanted to get to know because we have never spoke again. Must have been like two passing ships on a stormy sea; both of us lonely, looking for answers and not even sure of the questions. We were polite to each other, but I suspect our real-life expectations did not match up with our online fantasies. We parted in that wet parking lot, me going my way and she going hers.

I drove back to the motel room to get the rest of my stuff; I had no desire to spend the night alone in an unfamiliar town. Somehow, it felt much better to spend the night alone in familiar territory. As I left the room, I took one look in the mirror. I wondered where that obnoxious but clever kid had gone. I looked closely and thought I could see a sparkle in my left eye, but the old guy in me just reached out, turned off the light, and went out into the parking lot and slid behind the wheel of a dirty green Datsun. As the engine klubbered away, I eased out into the road and pointed the car towards home. I passed the old man walking down the sidewalk, his hand clasping a well-worn coat. The coat belonged to the woman he was with, and as we passed, our eyes met - and I realized he was a millionaire.

The return trip was uneventful. I got home early enough to go online and see who was on; by this time. I had started to meet a few people and, even thought they were miles away, there is a comfort to having friends to chat with. A few of my friends were on, and we joked and kidded and (with cyber palms) slapped each other on the back and gave each other comfort.